I didn't give Rosemary's Baby a fair chance the first time I saw it over a decade ago. For some reason, I just did not like it. I think it was mostly because you don't get to see the baby at the end. And it wasn't scary like I thought it would be. Well, whatever it was, I admit now that I was wrong. Rosemary's Baby is a pretty good movie.

Plot, plot, plot, plot, plot: Rosemary and Guy Woodhouse move into a fabulous new apartment in New York. Guy is a struggling actor (who, as we're informed SEVERAL times, was in the plays "Luther" and "Nobody Loves an Albatross") and Rosemary just wants a baby to complete their happy little family. They reluctantly make friends with their older neighbors, the Castevets, who become increasingly more involved in their lives. Rosemary has a dream one night that she is raped by a demon, but soon forgets about it when she finally becomes pregnant. The pregnancy is a difficult one, and Rosemary starts to become paranoid about the Castevets and the strange history of the building in which they are living.

The movie starts off with false pretenses. Pretty "la, la, la, la, la, la" music (sung by Mia Farrow) is playing over a sweeping view of New York City, and the titles appear on the screen in a delicate pink script. You think you're going to see some kind of romantic comedy or something. And for the most part, the film is fairly straightforward and normal, with only hints to something more sinister going on beneath the surface. It's not a scary movie by any means (at least not to me) but the mere mention of weird things that are happening around the Woodhouses - their friend Hutch telling them about all the strange occurrences in the building, the secretary hiding the closet door, the other actor going blind, Minnie giving Rosemary those strange drinks, Rosemary's incessant pain and the doctor who won't do anything about it - all make for a constant feeling of eeriness and things just not being right.

This pic is saved in my computer as "looking like shit."

I think that's what I loved the most about the movie. Director Roman Polanski does a phenomenal job of hint-dropping and making these seemingly unrelated events seem not as important as they should be for the moment. The Castevets are too interested in Rosemary's health, and all her concerns about being things not being okay with her pregnancy are pooh-poohed by everyone around her. She is even accused of being rude for wanting to see another doctor who will actually do something about the fact that she looks like complete shit for the first part of her pregnancy. After all, Dr. Sapirstein is supposed to be the best doctor out there. Yet, he doesn't even prescribe true prenatal vitamins for her.

But why all this attention around Rosemary's baby? What is really the purpose of those "herbal drinks" that Minnie makes for her? Why don't they want her influenced by anyone outside their group in the apartment building? Why is Guy suddenly on very friendly terms with Minnie and Roman, when he was the one who didn't want to get too close to them in first place? It's nothing but questions through most of the movie, where you know that everyone is in on it, but you're still not really sure what "it" is.

The devil's love marks.

Rosemary is easily influenced at first by the people around her and ignores the clues that mean danger for her and her baby. The young woman who was living with the Castevets mysteriously commits suicide, even though to Rosemary she seemed happy and grateful for everything the older couple has done to help her. Then Minnie gives Rosemary the woman's bad-smelling necklace filled with something called tannis root that is supposed to be for good luck. This rightfully creeps Rosemary out a little and she refuses to wear it.

This scene of the morning after the devil-rape is the creepiest part of the movie to me. Rosemary discovers ugly scratches on her body, explained away by her husband when he claims to have had sex with her while she was passed out. They had planned on making love that night anyway in the hopes of making a baby and he says that he "didn't want to miss baby night." I knew right then that Guy was a major jerkweed and was not to be trusted. What kind of husband thinks that it's okay to basically rape your wife, and what kind of wife does not get royally pissed when she finds out that her husband had sex with her even when she was unconscious? That's just wrong, even if he is your husband.

The worst husband in the world ever.

My first instinct at Rosemary's handling of the whole situation surrounding her strange pregnancy was to be pissed off at her because she was so stupid. Why trust a doctor who basically calls you an idiot for being worried about having severe pain during pregnancy? But Polanski manages to make you feel like Rosemary is truly trapped in her limited social circle. Her pain makes her not go out anymore, probably caused by Minnie's daily concoction that Dr. Sapirstein wholeheartedly stands by. For when she stops drinking it, the pain disappears, and she starts to feel better about her situation. Plus, Hutch was the only one who seemed genuinely concerned about how she was being treated, and wouldn't you know it? Hutch mysteriously falls into a deep coma just when Rosemary is supposed to have an important meeting with him. Guy seems to care less about her problems, so it really seems like she has no one else to turn to.

Honestly, I'm not that big a fan of Mia Farrow, mostly in her later years as a actress. She just doesn't seem to emote in any real believable way to me; however, I much enjoyed her in Rosemary's Baby. Her rant to Dr. Hill about witches, and Dr. Sapirstein, and her fear for her baby is heart-breaking to me. She sounds deeply frustrated and scared, but also like a total nut and you just know that Dr. Hill is not going to believe her - when he is her last hope for help against the witches. Ruth Gordon as Minnie Castevet is the perfect nosy and annoying old lady, and John Cassavetes perfectly plays the selfish but also self-conscious husband.

The bad part about this movie is that everyone already knows before they've seen it that Rosemary is having Satan's child. I think this might hurt the viewing experience for some audiences who are expecting much more exciting things to happen, with a dramatic conclusion including the reveal the devil spawn. I know I said earlier that I at first hated the movie because you never get to see the baby, and that is perhaps the reason why most others don't like it either. Now I realize that that is stupid thinking. The movie is not about getting to see the baby, but about everything leading up to the final scene. It is a superb tale of paranoia, pregnancy fears, and people who will do the unthinkable to get what they want. So I can say now that I don't hate Rosemary's Baby, and I am very ashamed about all the bad things I've said and thought about it over the years! There's so much more to discuss about this film, but this has run long enough already. Excellent film.

Catching Up On The Classics (Again): Rosemary's Baby. There are any Catching Up On The Classics (Again): Rosemary's Baby in here.

Yea! ME LOVED FRIGHT NIGHT. Don't know what took me so long to see it, but thank you Netflix, again. You have come through for me at the right time with the just the movie I wanted to see. I'm ashamed that I've missed out on so much because I hadn't seen Fright Night!

I'm sure you know the plot but here it is anyway: Teenager Charley Brewster discovers that a vampire, Jerry Dandridge (and his Reinfeld, Billy Sole), has moved in next door. No one believes him, of course, and when Dandridge realizes he's been found out he goes after Charley. Meanwhile, Charley and his disbelieving friend and girlfriend, Evil Ed and Amy, enlist the help of a man named Peter Vincent who hosts a horror TV show and claims himself to be the "Great Vampire Killer." Charley hopes Vincent will help him kill the vampire; the others hope he can convince him that Dandridge is not a vampire. Wackiness ensues.

I am certainly no prude toward the horror-comedy subgenre, but it is hard for me to come across one that I truly enjoy - where both the horror elements and comedy elements are equally well-produced. Simply put, Fright Night is a joy from start to finish. The characters, the acting, the comedy, and yes, even the horror side dealing with vampire lore is pulled off so well in this film. It was being faithful to the legend while still poking fun at it - especially that part where Peter Vincent says something like, "Well so far everything has been just like in the movies; we can only hope that it continues that way." Some of the scenes aren't really laugh-out-loud funny, but I found myself chuckling through pretty much the whole film. Subtle jokes that were sometimes too quick for me. Now that's the kind of humor I admire.

The humor also comes about from including all the classic vampire cliches: the coffin, holy water, crosses, sunlight, stake in the heart, and the creepy old house. Which brings me to my favorite comedy moment in the film. When Charley brings Peter Vincent to Prince Humperdinck's... um, I mean, Jerry Dandridge's house and Vincent says, "Where is the lair of the vampire?" "There." "Oh, I see what you mean." Hilariously, Dandridge's house is the one house on the block that is old and rotting from the outside, and best of all, always seems to be immersed in a perpetual fog - even when there is no fog anywhere else.

The man.

Chris Sarandon is A-mazing as the vampire. He's not ugly, but he's not exactly hot either, but he does have charm - and that's where the vampires always win out. They're always so GD charming. It's that vampire-romancey thing again. But back to Chris. He's funny, suave, and good at playing an asshole. This dude was fucking all over the place in the 80s; first in this, then in The Princess Bride, then later of course, as one of the first people to do battle with the ultimate killer doll Chucky in Child's Play. I've seen him in a lot of TV since then (was I the only one who watched "Judging Amy"?) and he's still a great actor, so good for him.

The effects are really not all that bad for the time, BUT. I'm not sure I like how a lot of vampire films turn vampires into these weird, slimy, demonic creatures just out of fucking nowhere. When Chris Sarandon first changes face in Charley's bedroom, he's this weird yellow-eyed, big jaw/mouthed hideous looking thing. Call me a purist, but I prefer my vampires to mostly resemble their human sides. There is no reason that they should be demon-looking in any way; all's they need is those fangs for the blood suckin'. So I guess I like my vampires to be like Buffy vampires. Looking like a human most of the time but able to morph into a vamp and when they're killed they turn to dust, as they should, seeing as how their bodies are dead and would be dust anyway especially if they are a couple hundred years old.

Definitely vomit-inducing.

But whatever. Rant over. That's not to say anything bad about Fright Night; I still freaking loved it. The other effects are convincingly done. I feel weird saying this, but I actually love scenes where people melt. Probably because said scenes usually make me vomit a little in my mouth, which to me means that the scene is realistic enough to make me imagine that actually happening which would totally make me vomit all over the place. Kinda like the scene at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark that used to scare the ever-loving shit out of me as a child. Anyway, great gore and makeup for this part and also on the various vampires. They all had a similar look to them, but each one was just a little different from the others, which was inventive and more interesting to watch for.

A thing that sort of bothered me but was also kind of funny at the same time was Evil Ed's extremely long "death" scene (since at the end of the movie it sounds like he didn't die?). I'll say the effects were also good in this scene, as Ed slowly (very slowly) transforms from a wolf back into a human with the table leg through his chest, but seriously, this part just goes on way too long. I was waiting for something different or surprising to happen but, nope. Kind of a sad scene, too, because Evil was funny.

I am Peter Vincent, Vampire Killer!

I thought the "Married... with Children" chick playing Amy was also rather funny in the earlier scenes where she thinks she keeps getting dissed by Charley. Just watch her in the background - she's always acting and completely into the character. And of course Roddy McDowall is the best as Peter Vincent, although the costuming they put him in did a lot of the work for him! Excellent wit, this man has. Nothing forced but completely natural.

Fright Night is a total vampire horror-comedy classic that I can't believe I've missed out on all these years. It's 25 years later (the movie came out the year I was born) and guess what? Of course! There's going to be a remake! I've been a remake defender for a while now, but this is a little ridiculous. Mostly because the vampire, Jerry Dandridge, is going to be played by Colin Fucking Farrell. I'm sorry, I just don't see it. Perhaps he can convince me otherwise.

"Where are you going, pencil dick?!"


P.S. If you're going to leave a comment, please entertain me and tell me what the word verification word is. They always make me laugh.

Catching Up On The Classics: Fright Night (1985). There are any Catching Up On The Classics: Fright Night (1985) in here.

I pulled my copy of Cape Fear off the shelf the other day just for something to watch and because I hadn't seen it in a while. Every time I watch this movie I can't help but think how awesome is it and I always have so much that goes through my mind about it and absolutely NO ONE to tell these awesome things to. But now I have you. Behold, I give you the awesomeness of Cape Fear. Yes, I use the word "awesome" a lot in every day life.

Plotty stuff: Lawyer Sam Bowden (Gregory Peck) lives a happy little life with his wife and teenage daughter, until the criminal Max Cady (Robert Mitchum) comes into their lives. Sam was a witness against Cady in a trial that put Cady in jail for eight years, and now that he's out, he wants revenge against Sam taken by destroying his family.

The infamous egg scene.

Where this film succeeds is in it subtleties. Max Cady is a sexual predator whom Sam witnessed raping a young woman and his way of getting back at Sam is to threaten and eventually carry out sexual violence against his daughter and wife (although the innocent daughter is his main target). However, the word "rape" is NEVER said in the film. But the audience gets it. The whole feeling, and threat, underneath the entire movie is rape. Not saying it somehow makes the tension so much more palpable and Max Cady that much of a monster, and an enemy to truly fear.

Bob Mitchum as Max Cady gives us the best villain in film history, horror or otherwise, and that is no exaggeration. His Southern-boy charming voice hides the coldest heart and most calculated beast of a man. One reason his character works so well is because he plays it as completely unapologetic. He, and everyone else, knows what he is and he doesn't give a damn. Sam knows right from the start what Cady's plans are for his family and Cady delights in taunting and teasing him throughout the film, until their final showdown at Cape Fear. Someone who is that brutal and sadistic and yet still a human is so much scarier to me than any horror film monster, mutant, or other killer. Just listen to the speech that Cady gives about what he did to his wife, and you'll know what kind of sick bastard we're dealing with here.

CREEPY-ASS MUTHAFUCKER RIGHT HERE.

The screengrab to the left shows Mitchum at his absolute SCARIEST. He's picked up a woman at a bar (who still leaves with him even after the police come for him for questioning) and they're in a motel room. I'm not sure what's happened before, if anything, but she's laying on the bed in a dark nightgown and Cady comes up to the end of the bed, bare chested, looking down at her. A look of concern on her face, and a subtle, yet completely angry and violent look on his. She leaps off the bed, but he grabs her arm and throws her back down, the doors slamming shut on the ensuing attack. The simple shot of Mitchum standing there looking at her, while balling one hand into a tight fist, is perhaps the creepiest and scariest any one has ever looked in a film. You see him doing that and all you can think is that that girl is pretty well fucked.

As for the Scorsese remake to this film, it's a pretty good movie, but I still prefer the Peck/Mitchum face-off. I used to think that the version that came out in 1991 was one of the only remakes that was just as good as, if not better, than the original. The more I watch the original, however, the less I think that. Same plot, but they are two totally different movies from different times. What's implied is always freakier than what is put in front of you, and this remake is simply too in-your-face and over-the-top. Bob DeNiro's Cady is cartoonish, and while he is still extremely violent and threatening, his 'tarded accent just makes you laugh.

Speaking of politically incorrect words, what the hell is wrong with Juliet Lewis in this movie? Honestly. Is she just a ditzy teenager or is it something else because she seems to be, well... a little slow. Jessica Lange acts like she's high all the time and speaks in a really breathy and therefore completely annoying voice. Nick Nolte is okay, but his Sam Bowden sometimes gets a little scary and violent himself - not the nice boy Gregory Peck established him to be in the original.

Speaking of the Peck-man, how 'bout showing a little love for this fantastic dude?

The best eyebrows in the biz.

Non-Horror Horrifying Film: Cape Fear (1962). There are any Non-Horror Horrifying Film: Cape Fear (1962) in here.

In my triumverate of horror film monsters - vampires, werewolves, and zombies - probably the one with the least room for growth, I thought, was werewolves. It's utterly simple lore - men (or women) turn into wolves at the full moon each month and if you get bit you turn into one yourself. How to kill them and/or reverse the effects of being bitten can change with each movie, but it's basically a scenario of fighting off huge wolves that rip you to shredded paper.

Bad dog.

Why not add some trained soldiers to square off with the werewolves in an isolated farmhouse? It certainly worked in Dog Soldiers. I like werewolf movies and I like war movies, with the camaraderie and loyalty among soldiers. And I got the feeling half-way through watching Dog Soldiers that this movie (as one of the actors also said) is not a werewolf movie with soldiers, but rather a soldier movie with werewolves.

The Big Fat Plot Paragraph: A squad of six British soldiers are dropped into the Scottish Highlands on a training mission. They soon find the remains of a Special Ops camp that had been killed and destroyed, but there is one survivor. Not knowing it at the time, werewolves begin hunting the soldiers, who are picked up by a woman (a zoologist) and taken to an old farmhouse where they hole up to fight off the savage enemies.

As a British film, I don't know much about the actors but they all seemed very talented and took their roles and this movie seriously. You care about these guys; they're nice and they're loyal and you really don't want to see them torn in half or turn into werewolves themselves. Sean Pertwee is actually the only one I recognized - he was in the awesome Event Horizon - and I loved his role as the Sarge who was fiercely protective of his men, even if some of them aren't too serious or are kind of wimpy.

Oh, it's beautiful.

As an enhancement to the men's relationship with each other, the dialogue is very good throughout. There's your standard dirty-mouthed soldier talk and a lot of British slang that I honestly didn't understand some of, but more importantly, the dialogue feels realistic. The soldiers seem like real guys in a real bad situation and they handle it and talk probably just like someone in this situation would talk. The dialogue is also great in that it is extremely funny. "My guts are out!" "Well, we'll put them back in!" "They won't fit!"

Speaking of guts, the gore and other effects are top notch. No CG here, but rather all practical effects with buckets of blood and stuntmen in body suits with probably really uncomfortable shoes. The werewolves look like your basic werewolf, except they seem to be exclusively bipeds. They're about seven feet tall (very menacing), quick and brutal in their kills and also happen to be a nice little family who live in the farmhouse when they're not out killing humans. Aw, how sweet. Anyway. There are some good gore gags in this flick, my favorite being when one of the soldiers is killed in a truck and when the others open the back door, a freaking RIVER of blood spills out. Killer. Also there are plenty of your random guts and people/werewolves being impaled. There could have been a bit more gore; what we get here only partially whet my appetite for blood. I'm just sayin', a little more couldn't have hurt.

Werewolves can be just as funny as zombies.

Big spoilers here.

The one flaw in the movie was Megan. If she is a werewolf, and the werewolves are her family, how is that she did not change until the very end? If we're going with traditional lore/myth here, then she should have changed as night set, UNLESS they changed the lore whereby one can be in control of their transformation. However, it is never explained either way so hardcore werewolf movie lovers or enthusiasts might have a slight problem with that.

That aspect of the film could also be a part of its success, though. The characters don't spend all their time worrying about finding out all they can about the creatures; they don't dig into a boring history of the mythology or all the possible ways to defeat them. They react much like soldiers would - they see a threat, and while they may not totally believe it at first, their only mission is to kill the threat and get the fuck out of there. Cut and dry, plain and simple.

Neil Marshall's directorial debut is no doubt a big hit, and regarded by a lot of fans as one of the best werewolf movies out there. Neil already gets big kisses from me because of his stellar film The Descent but now having seen Dog Soldiers (BTW, isn't that pretty much the perfect title? Kudos on that), I'd say this is one talented guy. Great shots and movement and action to keep the story going, but also able to make a genre picture about werewolves somewhat sentimental in how it shows the relationship and connection among soldiers. I like it A LOT. Great, great movie.

Movie Review: Dog Soldiers. There are any Movie Review: Dog Soldiers in here.

Wait, what? Those films don't have similar titles!

Okay, I'm cheating a little here. But here's my defense: The Haunting is a shortened title for the book that the movie is based on, The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson, which is obviously very similar to the title, House on Haunted Hill. Ha! I win.

But wait again. Are we talking about the original Haunting or the crappy remake? Is this the Vincent Price awesome House on Haunted Hill or the equally awesome Geoffrey Rush gorefest remake of House on Haunted Hill? I say, what the hell. Let's do 'em all!

First up, a William Castle chiller classic and its relatively faithful remake which completely upped the production design and gore to crazy levels. I give you:


                                        

Similarly Titled Films: The Haunting and House on Haunted Hill. There are any Similarly Titled Films: The Haunting and House on Haunted Hill in here.